If you consider the size of Pants, and that a fish fillet is normally ONE PIECE running from the head to the tail — that is one hell of a piece of fish he ate, with no sharing.
LOVE that last panel. The two men looking at the Scar. The *know* he’s lying and they do not like it. And they are not going to say a word.
The problem with how crap parents handle that situation is that there IS no good solution. If parenthood is acknowledged, the kid internalizes some of their identity from that parent and has a real conflict to deal with – I am like Mummy – Mummy is a bad person – Therefore I am a bad person. It takes a LOT of maturity to work through this.
But the alternative solution of trying to stop the child identifying them as a parent, is that kids are like parent-seeking homing objects in their early stages. For a toddler survival is entirely linked to not losing their parent. So the instinct to bond with the parent, no matter how bad they are is STRONG.
I suspect that there is a part of Selkie right now screaming, “I don’t care how bad you are! You are my father and you owe me. BE my father and BE A GOOD FATHER/person!” Kids never forgive abandonment. It’s too hard wired. The damage goes oh so deep.
Ooh, the Daddy issues that denial will lead to. Flesh of my flesh, bone of my bone. Blood will out.
There are many times as a parent you have that mental dialogue… I know this is wrong but do I need my child to be aware of this yet, or should I protect thier innocence until they are ready.
One potential issue in all of this is that while Selkie and Scar are both *people*, they are not *humans.* Sarnothi have been shown to have something very close to human viewpoints, but there’s still going to be differences in their psychological makeup.
Panel one, child reacts to being rejected by a parent who holds all the power in the situation.
Panel two and three, he throws her a sop and relents a little. He offers to not repudiate all his parental responsibilities. He throws her a bone.
Panel four, defeated child shows gratitude for the mercy.
Panel five, Dad (probably trying desperately to do the right thing) Jokes about the fact that she gets only a vague promise of mentorship from someone living in a distant community that she can’t reach on her own, and that he is a bad person for doing it.
That is one read of it, but that assumes that he doesn’t *want* to be her father. If he’s doing what he thinks he has to because he’s afraid of causing her more harm than good, then nobody is getting the steak. Panel 2 and 3 is him giving the most he feels he can get away with.
Wasn’t there an earlier comic where Gien effectively threatened to use Scar’s crimes and Selkie’s shared heritage against her? It seems more likely he’s concerned that acknowledging her will lead to her being seen as having tainted blood. Especially since we’ve seen that mixed clan children are rare and can face stigma already
This feels really… uncharitable. Like I think it’s certainly a way to read this but I don’t think Scar has any real power over this situation and is not doing this to abuse Selkie or make her feel stupid or powerless.
Scar has spoken to Todd and told him that he will not be a fatherly presence in Selkie’s life. He’s done so for a multitude of reasons, chief of which is keeping Selkie safe and giving her a less complicated life. Gien has already attempted to use Selkie as a cudgel against him. Then suggested roping the kids into his schemes and Scar vetoed it. He has been helping the girls with their Echo powers already.
I dunno. I’m not on anybody’s side, fictional characters, but nothing in what we’ve been given has suggested that Scar is attempting to manipulate this situation for his own ends.
I don’t mean to be uncharitable – Scar was a very bad person and is only accepted because of the work he does. Very often a bad parent thinks removing themself from a kid’s life is the best thing they can do for the kid. People tell them that too in rl, such as if they have a drug addiction. I have considerable sympathy for him, and it strikes me that Scar probably feels he has no right to be Selkie’s father – that he doesn’t deserve her.
Todd and Avery both look to me like they’re not buying Scar’s story about not being Selkie’s father. Especially after the almost-reveal he almost gave Todd in their laundry room.
Yeah, he’s lying. For her own good, maybe, but a lie is a lie, and *always* does harm. But after the wrongs he’s committed, how can he *possibly* extricate himself -and his *daughter* – *without* harm? I have at least some sympathy for the guy, but goodness. The true damage he did with his past actions reverberates outward and outward, even now that he’s trying to do better – and even in trying to do better, he continues to do wrong. Sure, he might need to keep his relationship with Selkie secret from the *rest* of the world, but what harm to tell *her*? She’s not a toddler, and she’s *asking*.
“Yes, I was with your mother. I should not have been. If you want to know more, I will tell you when you are older. I did wrong, and I’m sorry, but you are the *best* thing to have come from my actions. I will be in your life to the extent you and your father want me to be. Because of what I did, you will be in trouble if people know you are my daughter. It is a BIG secret, but you are good, and I am proud to be your father.” Yeah, that takes a lot of humility – and no doubt will cause Selkie some pain – but it’s the right thing to do. A painful truth is still way better than a pretty lie.
I totally agree. And yet, it absolutely makes sense that he would think he’s doing the right thing here. He also probably feels shame that he assumes she would share if she knew the truth, like if someone found out they were the child of Hitler or Ted Bundy.
Maybe he’s lying and maybe he isn’t. But the fact is, Selkie HAS A FATHER and a family that loves her and Scar knows it. He isn’t her father even if they have genes in common. Saying he is would not be kind given the baggage it comes with for her. Why would he?
I think this is a way for Scar to step out of the way. He knows Selkie has a good life and that he screwed up, bad. There’s no real way for him to let her just go on and grow up happy other than to step back. Is this the best way? Maybe or not, but he doesn’t know how to square the circle.
And that’s terrible!
If you consider the size of Pants, and that a fish fillet is normally ONE PIECE running from the head to the tail — that is one hell of a piece of fish he ate, with no sharing.
Remember, they have smaller eels now. Presumably the trade happened longer ago than yesterday.
LOVE that last panel. The two men looking at the Scar. The *know* he’s lying and they do not like it. And they are not going to say a word.
The problem with how crap parents handle that situation is that there IS no good solution. If parenthood is acknowledged, the kid internalizes some of their identity from that parent and has a real conflict to deal with – I am like Mummy – Mummy is a bad person – Therefore I am a bad person. It takes a LOT of maturity to work through this.
But the alternative solution of trying to stop the child identifying them as a parent, is that kids are like parent-seeking homing objects in their early stages. For a toddler survival is entirely linked to not losing their parent. So the instinct to bond with the parent, no matter how bad they are is STRONG.
I suspect that there is a part of Selkie right now screaming, “I don’t care how bad you are! You are my father and you owe me. BE my father and BE A GOOD FATHER/person!” Kids never forgive abandonment. It’s too hard wired. The damage goes oh so deep.
Ooh, the Daddy issues that denial will lead to. Flesh of my flesh, bone of my bone. Blood will out.
There are many times as a parent you have that mental dialogue… I know this is wrong but do I need my child to be aware of this yet, or should I protect thier innocence until they are ready.
One potential issue in all of this is that while Selkie and Scar are both *people*, they are not *humans.* Sarnothi have been shown to have something very close to human viewpoints, but there’s still going to be differences in their psychological makeup.
Panel one, child reacts to being rejected by a parent who holds all the power in the situation.
Panel two and three, he throws her a sop and relents a little. He offers to not repudiate all his parental responsibilities. He throws her a bone.
Panel four, defeated child shows gratitude for the mercy.
Panel five, Dad (probably trying desperately to do the right thing) Jokes about the fact that she gets only a vague promise of mentorship from someone living in a distant community that she can’t reach on her own, and that he is a bad person for doing it.
She gets the bone, he gets the entire eel steak.
That is one read of it, but that assumes that he doesn’t *want* to be her father. If he’s doing what he thinks he has to because he’s afraid of causing her more harm than good, then nobody is getting the steak. Panel 2 and 3 is him giving the most he feels he can get away with.
Wasn’t there an earlier comic where Gien effectively threatened to use Scar’s crimes and Selkie’s shared heritage against her? It seems more likely he’s concerned that acknowledging her will lead to her being seen as having tainted blood. Especially since we’ve seen that mixed clan children are rare and can face stigma already
This feels really… uncharitable. Like I think it’s certainly a way to read this but I don’t think Scar has any real power over this situation and is not doing this to abuse Selkie or make her feel stupid or powerless.
Scar has spoken to Todd and told him that he will not be a fatherly presence in Selkie’s life. He’s done so for a multitude of reasons, chief of which is keeping Selkie safe and giving her a less complicated life. Gien has already attempted to use Selkie as a cudgel against him. Then suggested roping the kids into his schemes and Scar vetoed it. He has been helping the girls with their Echo powers already.
I dunno. I’m not on anybody’s side, fictional characters, but nothing in what we’ve been given has suggested that Scar is attempting to manipulate this situation for his own ends.
I don’t mean to be uncharitable – Scar was a very bad person and is only accepted because of the work he does. Very often a bad parent thinks removing themself from a kid’s life is the best thing they can do for the kid. People tell them that too in rl, such as if they have a drug addiction. I have considerable sympathy for him, and it strikes me that Scar probably feels he has no right to be Selkie’s father – that he doesn’t deserve her.
I read Selkie’s expression in panel 4 more like Selkie’s not buying the denial but agrees to play along out of pity or something like that.
The side-eye from the other adults is strong.
Todd and Avery both look to me like they’re not buying Scar’s story about not being Selkie’s father. Especially after the almost-reveal he almost gave Todd in their laundry room.
And to me, it looks like Selkie’s not buying it either.
Yeah, he’s lying. For her own good, maybe, but a lie is a lie, and *always* does harm. But after the wrongs he’s committed, how can he *possibly* extricate himself -and his *daughter* – *without* harm? I have at least some sympathy for the guy, but goodness. The true damage he did with his past actions reverberates outward and outward, even now that he’s trying to do better – and even in trying to do better, he continues to do wrong. Sure, he might need to keep his relationship with Selkie secret from the *rest* of the world, but what harm to tell *her*? She’s not a toddler, and she’s *asking*.
“Yes, I was with your mother. I should not have been. If you want to know more, I will tell you when you are older. I did wrong, and I’m sorry, but you are the *best* thing to have come from my actions. I will be in your life to the extent you and your father want me to be. Because of what I did, you will be in trouble if people know you are my daughter. It is a BIG secret, but you are good, and I am proud to be your father.” Yeah, that takes a lot of humility – and no doubt will cause Selkie some pain – but it’s the right thing to do. A painful truth is still way better than a pretty lie.
I totally agree. And yet, it absolutely makes sense that he would think he’s doing the right thing here. He also probably feels shame that he assumes she would share if she knew the truth, like if someone found out they were the child of Hitler or Ted Bundy.
Maybe he’s lying and maybe he isn’t. But the fact is, Selkie HAS A FATHER and a family that loves her and Scar knows it. He isn’t her father even if they have genes in common. Saying he is would not be kind given the baggage it comes with for her. Why would he?
I think this is a way for Scar to step out of the way. He knows Selkie has a good life and that he screwed up, bad. There’s no real way for him to let her just go on and grow up happy other than to step back. Is this the best way? Maybe or not, but he doesn’t know how to square the circle.
So is he denying it because that’s the truth or is he denying it because he doesn’t want her associted with a bastard?