Todd,no. Amanda seems way too anxious to do this and she’s very visibly uncomfortable. You’re not helping her by doing this. You’re just going to make her more anxious. It isn’t going to teach her anything at all.
I mean I personally wouldn’t do this to my kid but … I feel like this might actually go well. Amanda’s been pushed into stuff she was uncomfortable with before and come out fine. So has Selkie. Todd strikes me as one of those parents who feels like helping his children expand their horizons is worth the risk of their anxiety. That being sad, Selkie’s a little hardier than Amanda about that sort of thing, so … let’s just see where this goes.
Not really. One of the times she was uncomfortable,she kind of got into trouble.
Also as someone who’s had panic attacks as a kid for going into situations to meet strangers with no relation to me. I highly doubt this is going to work especially when this feels like a friggin’ punishment for no good reason. DX “Yes let me make you see people that you have no interest in seeing because I wanna punish you for your behavior instead of talking to you about it.”
The thing here is, I don’t think Amanda is uncomfortable because she’s genuinely scared. She has never shown any reluctance to approach or fear of strangers (remember the volunteers trying to shoo her away from alcohol?… they WISH she were at least WARY of strangers). She is only ever scared of Selkie when Selkie’s in the process of actively scaring her, and the rest of the time she’s actively nasty to her, even if she’s been able to tone it down for a moment lately. That’s not really – that’s a ‘homophobia’ kind of uncomfortable, not ‘arachnophobia’ kind of uncomfortable.
IMHO, Amanda ‘doesn’t want to do this’ because every moment spent in this situation is a reminder of how WRONG she was to treat Selkie like that, a reminder that her behavior is actually very fairly described by the word ‘racist’, and that she really, for real, actually now isn’t going to be allowed to go on like that.
This is not punishment, this is a teaching moment. It’s very, very uncomfortable, but it’s discomfort with Amanda’s own headspace, not with the situation.
So yeah, I think she’s just gotta tough this one out.
Homophobia isn’t exactly a phobia. It’s just people being terrible to gay people and wanting them to all die. But this is literally not the same thing.
One. Volunteers weren’t telling her their names and were working. Two. Most the strangers she’s met are her family members/loving her family and she was a bit spooked.
Also this is literally the last thing I’d put her through. It VERY much feels like a punishment for her attitude. And especially without Andi is putting her on the spot. It’s a BAD idea and it’ll end badly. -___-
I think actually what it is is she’s expecting to go into this situation with them all acting like Selkie. She’s got pre-conceived notions, ones that are making her uncomfortable. After all, if they’re meeting people just like Selkie, she’s gotta meet a larger Selkie and that’s not a happy occasion for her.
Honestly, this seems like it’ll be good for her. She’s more than likely terrified because it’s something still relatively new for her. Sure, she knew of Selkie, but the presence of more people like her might be a shock still.
Some kids take longer to accept new things/people, and so they act out like Amanda is now. I don’t think she’s worried about getting eaten, just acting out because she’s scared.
This experience may be too soon for her, given the time span in which she was introduced to this idea, but ultimately it might be good for her to see more Sarnothi acting like humans.
I get what you’re saying though, but I have to say it feels like a kid going to the dentist for the first time. They’ll act the same way, but in the end they’ll find out it’s not so bad after all 🙂
It depends on the kid where the line is, but yeah, I’d say she’s close to a breakpoint and it’d be good to keep an eye on her. (Amanda does seem to build up “it will be terrible and people will be terrible to me” in her mind, though? She’s brash when she thinks she understands a situation and knows where the lines are, but she’s really really prepared for it to be horrible up front.)
If things start going badly — adult aggression (social, I mean, but you know) — then Amanda needs a rescue. Knowing that Benny’s mom is actually really timid, though… This might not be so bad. Amanda, the scary sea-monster lady is as scared of you as you are of her! Possibly more-so.
(I do think Todd’s going to maaaaaaybe need s’more experience with where kid breakpoints are, though. And how to recognize when it’s “no, really, kid will become non-functional if you push this.”)
Or, since we are talking about a story, and not real people, i predict Amanda will react however the author darn well wants her to act. And that this will be based not upon an imaginary father’s imaginary parenting but upon what moves his story foreward….
I did want to say that when a kid has a wrong idea, you don’t let it stand as being wrong either – esp. against any of the ‘ism’s – racism/sexism/etc. Amanda hasn’t learned from lecturing. So forcing her to see the people she’s slightly phobic about in ‘normal’ settings repeatedly may help (it helped my cousin who was a horrid brat – his grandfather raised him at first and both were raging sexists. When his father finally got to get custody after several years in court, he went about by asking his boss if he could take his son to work and show him that a male could have a good working relationship with females that were in charge of the dept. It didn’t fix everything, but gradually the more cousin saw these types of things the better he got.)
Which is why she needed to be talked to and I mean REALLY talked to rather than dragged to see people she’s treated like crap. Maybe even punished differently for this behavior because actually addressing the behavior is needed not dragging her to potentially be nasty to others.
Ah well, on the flip side, i can certainly understand how, given your own situation, the above scene *could* rankle. I mysrlf suffer from mild Autism, and I have yet to find a comic anywhere that treats my behaviors as anything other than caricature fodder. So, yeah, perhaps I should be the one apologizing… and I mean that. I recognize that i have empathy shortcomings, but that doesnt mean I know *when* they occur. So. Yeah…
Sometimes kids need to do things they don’t want to (like eat vegetables) or go places they don’t want to (like the doctors). In this case Amanda brought this upon herself by demanding to be included. She may not like the idea of hanging around more Sarnothi, but if she is going to be in Todd’s life that has to happen, and going out to a public restaurant is not even remotely torture for a child, absent some significant existing condition.
Amanda needs to learn a few important lessons and this is the perfect opportunity to teach them in a very very safe way.
1. Selkie and the others like her deserve to be treated like people (in the loose sense of the word, not the human being sense) and not monsters.
2. Amanda doesn’t get everything her way
3. Actions have consequences
If she ends up not having fun, fine, life is full of those moments, and you have to learn to deal with them. But she is not being put in any kind of dangerous or unfair situation. Its a freaking restaurant.
I don’t remember her saying she wanted in on this. She kinda seemed too creeped out by the idea of meeting more of people like Selkie. (It was bratty but yeah she wasn’t interested. This seems like Todd pushing her in on it to punish her in some small way.)
I actually agree here. Amanda I’d very clearly uncomfortable to a very high degree and it’s wrong to force this on her. It’s negative reinforcement and fear association. Todd needs to be more aware of his children’s feelings and needs.
I find that anything with a strong flavor, like blue, tends to overpower something mild like cod, I go for a mild cheddar, with cod. Something strong like tuna or Bluefish, or salmon can def. take on Blue or Roquefort.
It could just be fear of rejection, something she’s been dealing with for a while (a.k.a. “they’re gonna like Selkie and not me” — something she has experienced before).
Unless I’m mistaken, this is dinner with the Browns (as in Agent Brown). I don’t think it was mentioned to Amanda that the Brown family is mixed (similar to how Todd & Selkie are) so that should be an extra surprise/relief when she sees another human at the table.
Oh, no, it’s been mentioned that her main business is as a tattoo artist. Sorry, too late for a reference, but it was mentioned that she has the epic of Gilgamesh on her back– and at that point it was mentioned that she either works at a shop or owns one.
I prefer my cod coated in batter and deep fried like the British intended. Gives a taste of jolly old England without everything boiled to flavorlessness. Toss on some fries and I am much happier than I am usually when someone gives me fish.
*blinks* andi´s hairstyle has certainly evolved towards wild+colourful – yet nowhere near as wild as that requested tattoo. yup, cash up fron is a very reasonable thing in this case!
Amanda and Benny (the son without the speech pattern) will hit it off in a one sided manner somehow and Amanda will slightly crush on the boy that wants nothing to do with her.
And then Amanda will go to Selkie looking for tips on how to get Benny to like her
I think the girls are too young to be interested in boys, a few years left before that. Benny meanwhile is at the age where he’s interested in women, not girls. 😀
Out of curiosity, is it common for tattoo artists to mention waivers for particularly questionable pieces of ‘art’? I know they’ve got some mild phobias and superstitions (tattooing the name of a boy/girlfriend for instance), but anything strong enough to want a little bit of legal covering?
If someone wants a mostly permanent piece of art that questionable – yes I would say she is in the right so that later they can’t possibly come back and say it was her screwing up the art to make it look like that or that she tattooed him while drunk, etc.
Now, I don’t have any tattoos, and have never been in a tattoo parlor, so I don’t know if that would actually be standard or not.
I’ve done a bit of Internet research – although tattooing minors isn’t illegal per se, serious tattooists insist on declaration of consent from *both* parents (if applicable) and are *very* reluctant to tattoo someone under 14 here in Germany (about the equivalent of 13 in the US) and yet there’s still a risk of being sued 10 years later “for it was damn obvious I wasn’t capable of estimating the full range of consequences back then”.
I’ve done a bit of Internet research – although tattooing minors isn’t illegal per se, serious tattooists insist on declaration of consent from *both* parents (if applicable) and are *very* reluctant to tattoo someone under 14 here in Germany (about the equivalent of 13 in the US) and yet there’s still a risk of being sued 10 years later “for it was damn obvious I wasn’t capable of estimating the full range of consequences back then”.
(Sorry if this is a double post – something went wrong when I first posted this, and althoug the engine told me I had already posted this on first try it didn’t appear in another browser tab so I’m not sure if the first post went through)
Oh, ha, I see you’ve not spent much time around young girls lately, because let me tell you, from the second my nieces have entered school they’ve had “boyfriend’s”. Even the sensible non princess obsessed one. (And the boys are full participants, asking for kisses!)
Now that my oldest niece is eight the boyfriend girlfriend labeling thing is fading, but the crushes are not!
I actually suspect Amanda’s discomfort has nothing to do with meeting more ‘selkies’. It’s possible they weren’t sure where they were eating dinner until right before they got in the car, and now that Amanda knows where they’re eating, she doesn’t want to be there. What if this is a resturaunt her previous family liked to vist?
Or even better, this restaurant is owned by the previous family. So it’s not a “chance” of running in to them because they like to eat here. She WILL run into them because her adoptive parents are the hostess and the cook.
Todd,no. Amanda seems way too anxious to do this and she’s very visibly uncomfortable. You’re not helping her by doing this. You’re just going to make her more anxious. It isn’t going to teach her anything at all.
I mean I personally wouldn’t do this to my kid but … I feel like this might actually go well. Amanda’s been pushed into stuff she was uncomfortable with before and come out fine. So has Selkie. Todd strikes me as one of those parents who feels like helping his children expand their horizons is worth the risk of their anxiety. That being sad, Selkie’s a little hardier than Amanda about that sort of thing, so … let’s just see where this goes.
Not really. One of the times she was uncomfortable,she kind of got into trouble.
Also as someone who’s had panic attacks as a kid for going into situations to meet strangers with no relation to me. I highly doubt this is going to work especially when this feels like a friggin’ punishment for no good reason. DX “Yes let me make you see people that you have no interest in seeing because I wanna punish you for your behavior instead of talking to you about it.”
The thing here is, I don’t think Amanda is uncomfortable because she’s genuinely scared. She has never shown any reluctance to approach or fear of strangers (remember the volunteers trying to shoo her away from alcohol?… they WISH she were at least WARY of strangers). She is only ever scared of Selkie when Selkie’s in the process of actively scaring her, and the rest of the time she’s actively nasty to her, even if she’s been able to tone it down for a moment lately. That’s not really – that’s a ‘homophobia’ kind of uncomfortable, not ‘arachnophobia’ kind of uncomfortable.
IMHO, Amanda ‘doesn’t want to do this’ because every moment spent in this situation is a reminder of how WRONG she was to treat Selkie like that, a reminder that her behavior is actually very fairly described by the word ‘racist’, and that she really, for real, actually now isn’t going to be allowed to go on like that.
This is not punishment, this is a teaching moment. It’s very, very uncomfortable, but it’s discomfort with Amanda’s own headspace, not with the situation.
So yeah, I think she’s just gotta tough this one out.
Homophobia isn’t exactly a phobia. It’s just people being terrible to gay people and wanting them to all die. But this is literally not the same thing.
One. Volunteers weren’t telling her their names and were working. Two. Most the strangers she’s met are her family members/loving her family and she was a bit spooked.
Also this is literally the last thing I’d put her through. It VERY much feels like a punishment for her attitude. And especially without Andi is putting her on the spot. It’s a BAD idea and it’ll end badly. -___-
I think actually what it is is she’s expecting to go into this situation with them all acting like Selkie. She’s got pre-conceived notions, ones that are making her uncomfortable. After all, if they’re meeting people just like Selkie, she’s gotta meet a larger Selkie and that’s not a happy occasion for her.
exactly its not a phobia. its a hatred. People assume I am homophobic. Nothing could be further from the truth. I hate people for individual reasons.
Thank you for the absolutely pointless contribution to this conversation.
Honestly, this seems like it’ll be good for her. She’s more than likely terrified because it’s something still relatively new for her. Sure, she knew of Selkie, but the presence of more people like her might be a shock still.
Some kids take longer to accept new things/people, and so they act out like Amanda is now. I don’t think she’s worried about getting eaten, just acting out because she’s scared.
This experience may be too soon for her, given the time span in which she was introduced to this idea, but ultimately it might be good for her to see more Sarnothi acting like humans.
I get what you’re saying though, but I have to say it feels like a kid going to the dentist for the first time. They’ll act the same way, but in the end they’ll find out it’s not so bad after all 🙂
It depends on the kid where the line is, but yeah, I’d say she’s close to a breakpoint and it’d be good to keep an eye on her. (Amanda does seem to build up “it will be terrible and people will be terrible to me” in her mind, though? She’s brash when she thinks she understands a situation and knows where the lines are, but she’s really really prepared for it to be horrible up front.)
If things start going badly — adult aggression (social, I mean, but you know) — then Amanda needs a rescue. Knowing that Benny’s mom is actually really timid, though… This might not be so bad. Amanda, the scary sea-monster lady is as scared of you as you are of her! Possibly more-so.
(I do think Todd’s going to maaaaaaybe need s’more experience with where kid breakpoints are, though. And how to recognize when it’s “no, really, kid will become non-functional if you push this.”)
DX Also Amanda might not learn anything. She kinda hasn’t since their last talking to her.
Or, since we are talking about a story, and not real people, i predict Amanda will react however the author darn well wants her to act. And that this will be based not upon an imaginary father’s imaginary parenting but upon what moves his story foreward….
Thank you,Thorin. I’m sorry my opinion on something that rubbed me the wrong way about how this was playing out was just so awful and rude.
My apologies to you and Dave. Won’t happen again! =D
I did want to say that when a kid has a wrong idea, you don’t let it stand as being wrong either – esp. against any of the ‘ism’s – racism/sexism/etc. Amanda hasn’t learned from lecturing. So forcing her to see the people she’s slightly phobic about in ‘normal’ settings repeatedly may help (it helped my cousin who was a horrid brat – his grandfather raised him at first and both were raging sexists. When his father finally got to get custody after several years in court, he went about by asking his boss if he could take his son to work and show him that a male could have a good working relationship with females that were in charge of the dept. It didn’t fix everything, but gradually the more cousin saw these types of things the better he got.)
Which is why she needed to be talked to and I mean REALLY talked to rather than dragged to see people she’s treated like crap. Maybe even punished differently for this behavior because actually addressing the behavior is needed not dragging her to potentially be nasty to others.
Ah well, on the flip side, i can certainly understand how, given your own situation, the above scene *could* rankle. I mysrlf suffer from mild Autism, and I have yet to find a comic anywhere that treats my behaviors as anything other than caricature fodder. So, yeah, perhaps I should be the one apologizing… and I mean that. I recognize that i have empathy shortcomings, but that doesnt mean I know *when* they occur. So. Yeah…
Yeah, what you said. :3
Sometimes kids need to do things they don’t want to (like eat vegetables) or go places they don’t want to (like the doctors). In this case Amanda brought this upon herself by demanding to be included. She may not like the idea of hanging around more Sarnothi, but if she is going to be in Todd’s life that has to happen, and going out to a public restaurant is not even remotely torture for a child, absent some significant existing condition.
Amanda needs to learn a few important lessons and this is the perfect opportunity to teach them in a very very safe way.
1. Selkie and the others like her deserve to be treated like people (in the loose sense of the word, not the human being sense) and not monsters.
2. Amanda doesn’t get everything her way
3. Actions have consequences
If she ends up not having fun, fine, life is full of those moments, and you have to learn to deal with them. But she is not being put in any kind of dangerous or unfair situation. Its a freaking restaurant.
I don’t remember her saying she wanted in on this. She kinda seemed too creeped out by the idea of meeting more of people like Selkie. (It was bratty but yeah she wasn’t interested. This seems like Todd pushing her in on it to punish her in some small way.)
I’m wondering if this actually has to do with the visit itself or something else. I’ve don’t think I’ve ever seen her act this uncorfortable before.
I actually agree here. Amanda I’d very clearly uncomfortable to a very high degree and it’s wrong to force this on her. It’s negative reinforcement and fear association. Todd needs to be more aware of his children’s feelings and needs.
Actually, roquefort and cod sounds pretty good.
I find that anything with a strong flavor, like blue, tends to overpower something mild like cod, I go for a mild cheddar, with cod. Something strong like tuna or Bluefish, or salmon can def. take on Blue or Roquefort.
Or mussels! (but although they go well so many different sauces, my favorite remains : no sauce)
Is she really that terrified of the De’Madeas? Or is something else bothering her?
Yea I’m not sure what’s going on with her, seems pretty out if nowhere but I don’t think she’s faking it this time.
Kudos to Dave for actually making me interested in Amanda though, asuming she’s genuine then I’m curios to see where this will go.
It could just be fear of rejection, something she’s been dealing with for a while (a.k.a. “they’re gonna like Selkie and not me” — something she has experienced before).
Unless I’m mistaken, this is dinner with the Browns (as in Agent Brown). I don’t think it was mentioned to Amanda that the Brown family is mixed (similar to how Todd & Selkie are) so that should be an extra surprise/relief when she sees another human at the table.
I didn’t know (or maybe just forgot) Andi does tatoos too.
I don’t think it’s ever been explicitly said before.
Wasn’t she the one that did Todd’s tattoos?
Oh, no, it’s been mentioned that her main business is as a tattoo artist. Sorry, too late for a reference, but it was mentioned that she has the epic of Gilgamesh on her back– and at that point it was mentioned that she either works at a shop or owns one.
Found the reference, https://selkiecomic.com/comic/selkie690/
As always, Dave, love the writing in this 🙂
“Harbour” is not one of the best smells in the world.
disagree. smells like home. smells like work. smells good.
Not to talk about *fishing* harbor (which was my first association to that sign). Definitively not among my favorite 20,000 smells.
“The two best smells in the world” ??? I need a shower just thinking of them.
I’ve never had roquefort cheese before, so I don’t know what that smells like (but given it’s a blue cheese I imagine it would be very stinky).
I’ve had cod before. It’s really good! My Nonna used to serve it to us stuffed for special occasions and holidays.
I prefer my cod coated in batter and deep fried like the British intended. Gives a taste of jolly old England without everything boiled to flavorlessness. Toss on some fries and I am much happier than I am usually when someone gives me fish.
Ever had Limburger? Tried it once when I had a cold and couldn’t smell anything and it was pretty good.
Sounds like durian. Tastes great, smells nauseating.
Yeah, last time I was in Hong Kong my wife (who is Chinese) introduced me to “Stinky Tofu” (臭豆腐 or chòudòufu).
I couldn’t get it all the way to my mouth. I swear to god, it smells exactly like shit. Specifically.
She loves the stuff, as do most of my relatives on her side of the family. Myself, I cross to the other side of the street.
Roqufort, smells like.. well a lot like feet actually.
It’s an acquired taste. For that matter, so are feet.
Poor Amanda.
Amanda is SO gonna get the likes for Ben!
“ew he’s… wait. he’s cute. and he’s a gamer!”
Either that or their similarities will unpleasantly clash.
I’m predicting a mad crush on Benny by Amanda.
Just the words on the sign make my stomach churn.
*blinks* andi´s hairstyle has certainly evolved towards wild+colourful – yet nowhere near as wild as that requested tattoo. yup, cash up fron is a very reasonable thing in this case!
Yup… Karla’s Bad Decision Spa and Daycare: “You’re gonna make bad decision’s, might as well make them all at once!”
I’m sure that Andi is one of the resident Tattooist’s there, and that she gets these kind of “requests” ALL the time…
oh! yeah, they also do plastic surgery and raw seafood bar…
I’ve heard that somewhere else recently; what’s it from?
Omg I love QC! High five:)
Thank you!
I was thinking it was something from a commenter on Dumbing of Age or Wilde-Life, but nope, right in the actual comic over at QC.
/facepalm
I need to sleep more.
My theory for the up and coming meeting;
Amanda and Benny (the son without the speech pattern) will hit it off in a one sided manner somehow and Amanda will slightly crush on the boy that wants nothing to do with her.
And then Amanda will go to Selkie looking for tips on how to get Benny to like her
I think the girls are too young to be interested in boys, a few years left before that. Benny meanwhile is at the age where he’s interested in women, not girls. 😀
They’re all too young to have *realistic* interest in boys/girls, that’s not gonna come for a while yet.
Benny is old enough for the hormones to have just started start flowin’ so he’s probably attracted mainly to boobs.
The girls are probably just old enough to get over the “boys are yucky aliens” phase. Let ’em hit 11 or so and they’ll start coming around.
Out of curiosity, is it common for tattoo artists to mention waivers for particularly questionable pieces of ‘art’? I know they’ve got some mild phobias and superstitions (tattooing the name of a boy/girlfriend for instance), but anything strong enough to want a little bit of legal covering?
If someone wants a mostly permanent piece of art that questionable – yes I would say she is in the right so that later they can’t possibly come back and say it was her screwing up the art to make it look like that or that she tattooed him while drunk, etc.
Now, I don’t have any tattoos, and have never been in a tattoo parlor, so I don’t know if that would actually be standard or not.
SMART tattooists get waivers EVERY TIME.
Even if the tattooist is excellent at copying a design *exactly* you don’t really know how it’s gonna look until it’s done and healed.
I’ve done a bit of Internet research – although tattooing minors isn’t illegal per se, serious tattooists insist on declaration of consent from *both* parents (if applicable) and are *very* reluctant to tattoo someone under 14 here in Germany (about the equivalent of 13 in the US) and yet there’s still a risk of being sued 10 years later “for it was damn obvious I wasn’t capable of estimating the full range of consequences back then”.
I’ve done a bit of Internet research – although tattooing minors isn’t illegal per se, serious tattooists insist on declaration of consent from *both* parents (if applicable) and are *very* reluctant to tattoo someone under 14 here in Germany (about the equivalent of 13 in the US) and yet there’s still a risk of being sued 10 years later “for it was damn obvious I wasn’t capable of estimating the full range of consequences back then”.
(Sorry if this is a double post – something went wrong when I first posted this, and althoug the engine told me I had already posted this on first try it didn’t appear in another browser tab so I’m not sure if the first post went through)
Wait, what? Is there some exchange rate for time in Germany that makes a 14 year old 13 in the US?
Maaan, I’m never going to Germany, I’ll end up being 240 years old.
Oh, ha, I see you’ve not spent much time around young girls lately, because let me tell you, from the second my nieces have entered school they’ve had “boyfriend’s”. Even the sensible non princess obsessed one. (And the boys are full participants, asking for kisses!)
Now that my oldest niece is eight the boyfriend girlfriend labeling thing is fading, but the crushes are not!
Oh kids are crazy these days.
I had my first crush at the age of 6. Most of my friends thought the opposite sex were aliens so I didn’t know anybody else who felt like I did.
You mean … they *aren’t* ???
anyone else notice the armpit hair/fuzz on andy in the last panel? lmao. Nice detail
I actually suspect Amanda’s discomfort has nothing to do with meeting more ‘selkies’. It’s possible they weren’t sure where they were eating dinner until right before they got in the car, and now that Amanda knows where they’re eating, she doesn’t want to be there. What if this is a resturaunt her previous family liked to vist?
Or even better, this restaurant is owned by the previous family. So it’s not a “chance” of running in to them because they like to eat here. She WILL run into them because her adoptive parents are the hostess and the cook.
That’s a really neat thought.
Anything named “Cheddar Harbor” NEEDS to be on the coast of either Massachusetts or Maine. 😛
Tillamook County is on the Oregon Coast and the Tillamook Creamery there has a *wicked* smoked cheddar.
I did a search. There are actually some representations of Mickey Mouse crossing the Delaware. One’s actually a ceramic statue.