To my fellow Americans, happy Black Friday! I hope your brought chainmail and a good sword with you as you venture to market. >:D
(Fixed an issue with Selkie’s dialogue coming out of Amanda’s mouth)
I wasn't originally going to have Todd flinch back quite so dramatically in the last panel, but after the reactions to yesterday's strip where he storms forth upon Andi I thought maybe a little bit of counter-storming would be fun. Also, I wanted to with "that" dialogue choice but felt the pictograph cuss words wouldn't work in this moment, so I went this route. I suppose you could just assume she's saying "Rock" and Todd's head is hiding the short leg of the R.
Oh, man. Here it comes. 🙁
Well done, Dave. I figured that’s part of what’s really festering in Amanda, Todd was looking right at her, and didn’t choose her.(logic doesn’t apply, she’s an 8 year old who thinks in fairy tales). What’s worse for Amanda is that he chose someone who is not (even) human. Someone that Amanda has always considered less than a person because she’s not human, someone who’s been in Amanda’s way since Amanda was dumped.
In Amanda’s internal dialogue it might translate as “Even if you were the last little girl in the world I wouldn’t want you for my daughter. I’d adopt a fish instead. Even though you look just like me, I’m going to pick that one, and be her Daddy!”
Whoa Amanda. Wow. I mean, ouch. Todd’s gonna feel like dirt after that… also, ouch Amanda, Selkie isn’t a that, she’s a person. I know you’re angry, but gosh you were doing so well with her. I chuckled at the gore comment, but Selkie needs to know threatening to gore someone even if you don’t really mean it isn’t a good or wise thing to do.
I actually feel pretty bad for Todd right now. Amanda just kicked him in the parental balls.
He kind of brought it to a head though verbally bashing her mom in front of her. As much as he also was entitled to express his anger, there are dire consequences dressing down your child’s other parent (no matter *how* justified it is) within the child’s earshot. Best thing they can all do is calm everyone down and everyone (minus Todd’s parents and Selkie) apologizes.
“In front of her”?
He had no freaking idea she was within earshot. In fact she and Selkie were sent to Selkie´s room so that they would be out of earshot.
If kids are even in the NEIGHBORHOOD, they are potentially in earshot, especially with yelling conversations.
Ah, yes, “You didn’t lie to the children and pretend what I did was okay, so now everything is YOUR FAULT!” The national anthem of abusive partners everywhere.
He doesn’t have to pretend everything’s okay – he’s made it clear to Andi that they are THROUGH this whole time, and barely spoke to her. His focus has been on Amanda and Selkie.
But when you have an eight-year-old who’s excited to meet her dad for the first time and has a host of psychological issues related to her own abuse and abandonment, you don’t proceed to dump your emotional issues on her and try to turn her against her mother. That’s terrible parenting. Amanda’s hatred of Selkie and the feeling she stole attention that was rightfully Amanda’s (from her perspective) means that Andi is going to stay Amanda’s primary caregiver for the time being, and that means if Todd wants to stay in Amanda’s life he has to be able to at least have a conversation with Andi without yelling at her. The last thing Amanda needs is to be stuck in the crossfire between them, or to get the sense it’s *her fault* her mommy and daddy aren’t together anymore. Children are vulnerable and don’t have the social or life experience required to understand this sort of thing. If Todd’s being angry at her mom, her mom who CAME BACK FOR HER when HE DIDN’T, the sense she’s going to get is that he’s just mean to her (as seen here) and that maybe he doesn’t actually want her.
Who tried to turn who against who? Kids weren’t supposed to be a part of that conversation!!!
“Her mom who abandoned her and told her father she was dead came back for her when he, who didn’t even know she was supposed to exist anymore, didn’t.”
Amanda needs to be told the whole truth not just the bits that fit Andi’s own little story. Then maybe she’ll vent her anger at the right target.
I don’t even know what a mature adult is supposed to do in this situation. I hope Theo can think of something, he seems reliable.
Though it’ll make the situation worse, I HOPE Todd will next point at Andi and say “She told us you were dead!”
Let the f***ing cat out of the bag and go to see a shrink, the lot of you. (this directed at the comic’s characters)
Well, Amanda… that’s telling him! You sure know how to cut to the bone.
Commenters have been worrying for months that you would eventually think of that angle and nurse it as a secret hurt. I don’t think anyone predicted you would shout it at your father within… what, a bare two hours of meeting him? And yet, in retrospect, knowing what we do about your character, it seems inevitable!
Also… she is shouting. Yes.
She’s also crying.
Worrying, hell. We *predicted* it.
And called it right on the nose that she still doesn’t see Selkie as a person, but rather a freakish thing that unfairly took what was supposed to be hers.
Yeah, yeah, terrible childhood, no one deserves what Amanda got — but Selkie didn’t deserve what she got either, and she put up with Amanda’s bullying and abuse for several years coming out none the worse except for a well honed capacity for snark and a bit of a defensive shell.
Well, Amanda did defend Andi, while putting Todd on the offensive and outright putting down Selkie as lesser-than.
Rens, the second paragraph is on-point. Selkie, considering what she went through, was affected differently, but she also developed the abilities to empathize and be diplomatic when needed/set respectful boundaries (seeing how she handled Tommy Trunchbull in the cafeteria, post-intervention stuff). Amanda’s learned experience taught her to treat any interaction as potential conflict, with the main tactic being “hit where it hurts the most until they’re crumpled in pain”. So this reaction from Amanda, while predicted, is still saddening to see, especially calling Selkie a dehumanized “that”.
I’m curious now how this gets defused, and wondering how Theo and Mari would handle this–either way, Monday will be interesting.
I’ll reference strip #238, when Heather filled Selkie in on the fact that, not only did Amanda’s adoptive family abuse her, but Selkie showing up when she did meant that critically-needed help coping with that fact was deflected by “Okay, what the hell do we do with Selkie?”
It likely still happened, but the attention was split – there’s only so much two people at an orphanage with 8+ kids can do in any given day.
Forgot – abused her then GAVE HER BACK to the orphanage when she’s old enough to know what’s going on.
If Andi is being the mother she’s trying to be, she will be the one to defuse this situation. Bottom line – he can’t be looking for her if he thinks she’s dead.
Might work. But she’s zeroed in on the fact that everyone’s saying she looks like him. To an eight year old, that’s gotta mean, he should have recognized her! Even if he thought she was dead, he should have seen her and known she was important. He should have investigated and discovered the truth. And he didn’t. He walked right past her and picked someone else.
Hey, if they look so much alike, then why didn’t AMANDA recognize that this might be her Dad, back when they first met? It’s all HER fault, for not asking him if they could be related!
(No, I don’t expect that argument would work on her, but the idea amused me anyway.)
Adults rarely see how a kid looks just like they did as a kid, cause they haven’t retained the memory of “self” from when they were that age. So I don’t blame Todd not spotting the difference (if there is one – I don’t see it that much, but it might be the way the comic’s drawn, not actual lack of similarity).
Of course that’s true, but Amanda has no way to know that. She’s eight.
I think Amanda’s reasoning is Theo, Mari and even Todd himself all acknowledged that she’s the spitting image of him. She’s hurt that even though she looks like a ‘little clone’ of him, he spoke to her and never even seemed to notice.
To be fair, Todd sort of was biased against her. He saw her and immediately painted her as ‘adorable’ and ‘a little cheerleader’ who didn’t need him. Whereas Selkie was alone and different. He effectively profiled the kids and chose which one whom he thought he’d connect with more.
Nothing especially wrong with that, but to Amanda, he saw her, someone who everyone pegs as Todd’s almost immediately, and skipped over her anyways. Didn’t even give her a second look because he thought she didn’t need him.
Todd did some finger pointing last page, but now the finger is pointing back at him and screaming, “Why did you assume I was ‘fine’ based on my looks? Why didn’t you notice me based on my looks? Who are you to say Andi is a crappy mom when to me, YOU’RE the crappy parent?”
Amanda is a conflicted bundle of emotions and thoughts. She’s all torn up inside about a lot of things.
All very true imo:) I concur, SpringPop.
I don’t know that this would be a good thing to throw out given the situation — especially given how it might cause Amanda worse trauma — but Amanda specifically presented herself as awesome and capable and fine. Like, “I want a dad and I’m strong enough to proactively seek one.”
Selkie was so far gone she didn’t think she was adoptable.
So in some ways, Amanda kind of — through no fault of her own — convinced Todd that she’d be fine, that she didn’t need anyone. Certainly not as bad as Selkie did.
The other note is that if Todd was missing a daughter he thought was dead, the LAST thing you’d want a psychologically healthy adult to do is adopt someone who looks just like their dead daughter. Anyone remember the Simpsons episode where Ned Flanders was trying to turn his new love into a vision of his dead wife, even cutting her hair when she slept?
Your last paragraph is a very good point. Explaining that won’t work with Amanda, but is a realistic reason why Todd didn’t pick her.
Based on the flashbacks, it looks like he was taking care of his issues by helping Selkie with hers. Which is a very healthy way to cope with abuse.
To be fair Amanda was given up before he got there so to my knowledge he never saw her face.
But with his and Andi’s childhood pictures, and a basic understanding of genetics, he’d have a general idea what she would’ve looked like. And with how much he wanted his baby, I can pretty much guarantee he’s spent a fair amount of time imagining her over the last few years.
Fair enough
If she died at birth, why would he imagine her?
Because parents do that kind of thing. They mark the years, and see other kids, and think, “If only… s/he’d have been that tall, and starting to look like…”
He wanted that baby. Of course he’d have been imagining her through the years.
It was Selkies loneliness that resonated with Todd and reminded him of the angry, hurt child he used to be. If Amanda hadn’t been so good at the “charm the adults” act, if she had just been authentic, Todd may have seen something to connect with in Amanda.
Can’t blame a kid for the defenses they throw up, though. It’s just a sad irony.
Oh of course. There’s no way Todd could have known. I’m not blaming Todd, but I think that Amanda’s logic behind the whole thing is she’s very hurt and thinks he should have known she was his and that she needed just as much help as Selkie.
And she’s not that good at charming. Lillian knows better.
Also of course Selkie resonated with Todd. I’m not saying he was wrong for it, but he did indeed profile their children based on their looks. They others all ‘looked’ fine. They ‘looked’ like they didn’t need help. They ‘looked’ like they’d all he picked by parents because they ‘looked’ normal. Selkie was different. Selkie was alone. Selkie was visibly not going to be chosen.
He was drawn to Selkie because she didn’t seem fine. She looked like she needed help.
I’m glad he chose Selkie, I really am. Selkie needed him and he needed her, but Amanda needed Todd just as much, I think she feels like Todd didn’t need her as much as she needed him.
Except she was surrounded with others and Selkie was by herself. He didn’t base it on looks. More sympathy for Selkie and liking her.
Holy Cheese and Crackers! The blow up we’ve been expecting! Right now, Amanda needs to get this out. The emotional trauma she’s experienced, years of being at an orphanage, the shock of her mother returning for her and now her “Dad” is yelling at her Mother. I would assume she experienced a lot of yelling from her I used the term loosely “Foster Parents” so her responding like this makes sense. Andi is probably the only person who has ever focused solely on Amanda. Amanda wants to protect the person who rescued her and doesn’t care if her Dad takes it. Amanda as a bully knows how to cut and where to cut. Todd and Andi need to cut the blame game (Todd’s words about how if Andi hadn’t given her up, she wouldn’t have been abused was a major low blow and uncalled for) and realize that they need to fix this. Todd knows what it’s like and needs to step up but without excluding Selkie. This is going to be one hell of a battle.
Funny thing is, Andi’s not playing the blame game. She’s already trying to fix her mistakes. She knows she did something nearly unforgivable and is slowly and painfully taking full responsibility for it.
That’s something a real adult does.
Again, I have to say this: Todd’s reaction is justified. Completely realistic. Completely human. But there’s more important things at stake than saying “you should have done this” 20 times until the “villain” feels like crap.
Let’s see how Todd likes his own medicine of how he should have done something he knew nothing about.
How does not telling Amanda what really happened so she treats Todd like this responsible? At all?
That’s an easy one. Andi isn’t strong enough to be a 100% mature mother yet. She did the hard things that she was able to do at the time. She did a horrible job, and no where near complete, and that’s why Todd can say that Andi needs to try harder. Because she’s NOT doing all the right things a fully grown mature adult does. And based on what most normal functional families do, he’s right.
That being said, it’s still better than not doing anything at all.
But let’s be real for a second: Why would Andi suddenly know all the common things we take for granted about responsibility, maturity, confrontation, honesty, and integrity just because she adopted Amanda? I’m not buying that, you’re obviously not buying that, Todd’s not buying that, and Amanda already knows enough about what’s going on to realize that her mom is just as messed up as she is. That’s why Amanda can sympathize with her.
So right now, Amanda’s not in the dark or naively ignoring the bad stuff Andi has done (unless Amanda forgot how to put 2+2 together from the abuse she suffered) but she’s also not ignoring the good stuff Andi has done either, no matter how small it is. The only thing Amanda is doing here is giving credit where credit is due.
I for one, am grateful that Andi is trying to rebuild all the bridges she burned even though she knows she has no idea how to do it right, instead of just hiding in a corner.
Because not telling her the whole story has nothing to do with her attacking Todd for not picking her. She already knows that he thought she was dead. Hating Andi more won’t make her hate Todd less, she’ll just be left with two parents whom she both hates. Is it a good idea?
Here’s a hint: no.
Poor Amanda. She doesn’t realize who lied to her about why Todd never found her.
But Andi did tell Amanda, that Todd thought she was dead. She just didn’t get to tell her *why* he thought she was dead, because Amanda freaked out, before she could tell finish explaining. (as seen way back from page 655 to 660)
Lying by omission is still lying.
The only thing ~telling the truth~ would accomplish here is freak out Amanda even more, if she hasn’t figured it out for herself yet. Some things need to stay between adults until kids are emotionally mature enough to be part of that conversation, and Amanda is anything but emotionally mature right now.
Do you think she’s going to bond with Todd over how Andi ~failed them both~, magically forgetting her hurt from him adopting Selkie over her?
He had no idea she was his kid! For all he knew,she was dead! It would explain so much and she owes Amanda that. Like she’s hurt so many people. There was a chance before and she missed it.
I think Amanda has clued in on that actually. I think she understands that Andi gave her up, but that she came back and looked for her to try and make up for it. Amanda isn’t dumb. There’s been enough said that I’d say she knows or at least has a pretty good idea of what Andi did.
Andi couldn’t get out of saying that she gave Amanda up, but Amanda definitely doesn’t realize who said she was dead. When Andi talked about it, Amanda reacted poorly and she wanted to hurt whoever said that. She has accepted that her mother couldn’t have her for a while, but she seems to have only redirected all that onto Todd.
Andi still lied. Lying by omission is still lying.
I’m not sure how that’s a response to what I said? I said I think Amanda has clued in or at least has a vague idea of what happened with what Andi did. I didn’t say anything about Andi’s lies, I said I think Amanda has a pretty good idea of what happened.
@LadyObvious: I’m genuinely curious. What, if anything, would Andi have to do for you to give her a break? Concretely, I mean.
I’m not trying to be confrontational, though my views on Andi and yours clearly diverge. That’s fine; it’s just that I have no sense of what it would take on Andi’s part (other than wearing sackcloth and ashes for the rest of her life and regularly flogging herself while saying “I’m sorry” to Todd) to get at least a neutral comment, and so I feel like I’m missing half the conversation because I don’t know one set of terms in the debate.
I have been saying things. Basically to stop lying and give Todd time with Amanda. Like by himself and Selkie so he can have a chance to soften up.
Well now Amanda won’t want any alone time with Todd at all. Andi definitely needs to talk to Amanda about Todd and how she shouldn’t be angry at him for something he had no control over or knowledge of. I disagree with giving her alone time with Todd and Selkie. Alone time with todd, sure, if she wants it, but if Selkie is there she’s going to feel excluded or outnumbered.
Amanda and Todd? Absolutely.
Amanda, Andi, Todd and Selkie? Fabulous.
Amanda, Todd and Selkie? No thank you. Helps no one.
Andi and Selkie? Actually I think these two would resonate very well together! Maybe in the very distant future she can get to know Selkie better on a personal level, but it’d be awkward as hell for just the two of them alone any time soon lol
Once Amanda is comfortable with Todd and Selkie, I’d say it’s her choice to see them without her mom if she wanted to. Or even let Selkie come to Andi’s house to hang out with Amanda if the two girls became friends and we’re comfortable with hanging out together. Again, veeeeeeeery distant future when EVERYONE is comfortable.
1) She explained to Todd what happened. Todd has responded reasonably to that (ie, “you did WHAT. YOU WHAT. *Insurmountable rage*”).
2. She told Amanda Todd thought she was dead so that Amanda would not blame him for not knowing to find her, and it is entirely possible Amanda has figured out that yes, Andi was the one who told him that. If not, it’s probably a defense mechanism because Amanda is a severely traumatized and abused eight-year-old with attachment issues, and Andi is the first person in a very very long time who has genuinely wanted her so she is going to cling, so they shouldn’t shake that cling until she’s in a much more stable place because Amanda has enough attachment and trust issues as it is. (But I guarantee you there’ll come a day, probably in adolescence, where Amanda goes to Andi and goes “What were you THINKING?!” And on that day, I will absolutely be on Amanda’s side.) And honestly, informing her of that past mistake isn’t going to help Amanda any right now, because the important part is that Andi is here now and going to undo that mistake as best she can.
3. She adopted Amanda maybe a week or two ago, and that time was almost certainly spent in sudden adjusting.
4. Todd met Amanda on SATURDAY. It is now MONDAY. This is the initial meeting just for them to meet each other and for the parents to have a “well what do we do now” strategy meeting given the total relationship implosion and the Selkie factor. Both of those things are important, Amanda was understandably anxious to meet her father (and grandparents, it turns out), and so having Andi there was necessary both for the “what comes next” and for the “what Amanda needs” factors. There’s no way Todd’s letting Andi go without having at least some plan for visitation laid out, but between meeting the grandchild, the fight, and now this discussion, that talk hasn’t happened yet. (And honestly, that fight needed to happen and the adults needed to see it before there could be any realistic planning. There’s just way too many issues there and they are way too deep-seated.)
The thing is, Andi cannot make things right with Todd without going back in time and saying in that delivery room “you weren’t there, and I panicked, and I can’t be a mom on my own I’m not entirely sure I’m ready to be a mom now at all, and my mom said it’d be better for her and she’d go to a family who really wanted her and I thought about you and your parents and I’m sorry but you weren’t there and I panicked.” And she can’t do that. But she’s finally been pushed into a point where she can’t run away or freeze up until things go away, and she’s finally starting to make things better, even if they’re hard. She’s still making mistakes (you SERIOUSLY thought this relationship wasn’t utterly obliterated the moment you lied? SERIOUSLY?!), but she’s suffering the consequences for them and the fact is this is still better for Amanda and Selkie than the alternative.
It’s clear Andi’s response to stress is to freeze up, run away, and hope that if she ignores it long enough it’ll go away because she’s even more afraid of telling someone she’s worried than she is of the thing itself. It’s fight, flight or freeze instincts, and Andi chooses freeze every time. This is a terrible, ineffective, irrational coping mechanism, but the thing is since it is instinctual it’s really difficult to shake until it blows up in your face enough times. Every time this issue happened, she was living second-to-second and choosing the easy “no it’s fine” even though it wasn’t because that would mean she wouldn’t have to think about it anymore (until of course she had to again because it wasn’t going away.) And if she was thinking at all, she was convincing herself “I can totally do this, I don’t need help, and I’d just get in trouble or make things complicated if I brought this up so I’m just not going to and it’ll be fine.” And that’s how she ended up panicking while giving birth and grasping at the first, easiest solution offered. It’s how she ended up panicking while talking to Todd and saying the thing she thought would get her the least in trouble. Both times, you can tell from the flashbacks and her subsequent behavior that she immediately realized “Well, crap” and getting herself into EVEN MORE TROUBLE. (Having been in this thought process: Yes, it is stupid and I know I should be asking for help. But I keep putting it off, and then I’m scared because I shouldn’t have put it off, and before you know it I’m paralyzed with shame and anxiety, haven’t left my dorm room in days, and am ignoring the phone that keeps ringing in the hopes that’ll magically make it stop while my mom’s driving an hour across the bay to make sure I’m still alive, all because I got behind on one paper and panicked about it until I was failing all my classes.) Like I said, the only way to really deal with this is to let it blow up in your face, face the consequences, and deal with it while a competent functional adult reminds you that it’s not actually the end of the world and that you could have avoided this if you’d just asked earlier, at which point you hopefully learn and remember and catch yourself sooner next time it happens.
So Andi handled things terribly, and it blew up in her face. But she learned from that, and she got over the considerable nerve it took to start looking for Amanda, and when she realized it was hard and she’d screwed up she decided to actually deal with it rather than running away again. And she’s learning to handle Amanda remarkably well and quickly. The past is done and she screwed up. But it looks like she’s finally starting to learn to do better and manage the situation, and she’s still facing the consequences for that but actually growing up enough to deal with and acknowledge them is progress in and of itself.
The “I’ll gores you fors thats laters” speech bubble points to Amanda
Dave> Sophie’s right. That speech should be pointing to Selkie.
My first thought was that Amanda was mocking Selkie, but on second reading it doesn’t make sense. Yeah.
Yeah, ‘cuz Amanda doesn’t use Selkie’s speech patterns.
Plus, Selkie’s obviously shouting something in the background given the way she’s drawn.
No, she is definitely quoting what Selkie said here:
https://selkiecomic.com/comic/selkie648/
You’re right – but I didn’t catch that til you pointed it out. Probably needs quotes or something.
Yes, it needs quotes. I didn’t catch that either. Totally missed it!
I feel really good about this. I’m glad someone is standing up to everyone saying Andi was a bad mom. It’s no easy task to keep OR let go of a child, and when your own mom tells you to let her go… I am bias, true, but I still feel very happy that someone, especially her daughter, appreciates that she tries.
Is it just me, or in Panel Three is Amanda picking up Selkie’s speech defect?
Scroll up a little to Sophie’s comment. The “I’ll gores you for that” speech bubble should be pointing to Selkie.
Scroll up a little to Sophie’s comment. The “I’ll gores you for that” speech bubble should be pointing to Selkie.
A matter for correction, then.
No. Amanda is quoting Selkie from this page:
https://selkiecomic.com/comic/selkie648/
And BAM. This is the moment that Todd realizes that Andi is trying very hard.
Todd had no reason to think that Andi sacrificed anything for Amanda’s sake and just adopted Amanda so that the Todd x Andi ship can sail again.
More importantly, for all the talk of him saying of the pain Andi put him though, Amanda has been through far far worse. Amanda is the one hurt the most by Andi’s actions, and she knows this (or will know it soon if Amanda suddenly forgot all the street smarts she learned by surviving abuse just for this one plot point, which I highly doubt), yet still sees the good in her.
Long story short, Todd made the fatal mistake of speaking for his daughter when he doesn’t even know her yet.
If I was Andi here I would hope I said this to Amanda. First get down to her level getting between her and Todd. “First off don’t worry I won’t be taking you back to the orfanage ever. Your mine for always. That said I know your mad and its ok to be mad just as its ok for your dad to be mad at me. Feelings were hurt on all sides here. But you don’t get the right just cause your upset to EVER call Selkie a ‘that’ she is a carbon based life form just like us not an object. You need to apologize to her for that when you calm down. Second we have talked about this no crusing. Cursing is never ok. Espiecally to your parents.” Hug her to show her that you mean what you said about her being yours “its my fault your dad didn’t know to look for you but thank you for seeing I am trying.”
Over the history of this comic, I’ve been amazed at the story line. Of course the art work has always made me titter a bit as it all seems rushed and never really what anyone could call “high-art” but it WORKS! The dialogue WORKS! The inflections and emotions of the characters WORK! I often wonder what this strip would be like if it were drawn in the manner of say – Girl Genius – or even Sandra and Woo. But it WORKS.
That being said, Dave, I wonder why you bother to tell the audience about your decisions regarding the making of the comic. In the world of Selkie, you are GOD. Let the readers decide what’s in the dialogue bubble. You don’t owe any of us an explanation as to whether it says “Dumb-rock” or the alternative. We all know Amanda is a firework ready to explode and now she did. Let the reader make up their own mind.
Let the story tell itself.
The point I’m trying to make, I suppose, is that your running commentary takes away from the strip since it discusses the options you DIDN’T make.
All that being said, the readers here are as into this strip as much as I am and I’ve been thinking that when this arc is over, your hiatus is going to make a lot of people lonely for their Selkie Fix.
I like seeing “under the hood,” myself. I read the strip, I get the impression from it, and then I see what the author was thinking — and can then apply my own decisions as to whether I agree or disagree with any changes. (Generally agree! *grin*)
He certainly doesn’t have to tell us anything about the process underneath the hood, but I’m thrilled that he did choose to do that. As an aspiring webcomic artist myself, it’s intensely interesting to me to see what all went into the choices that were made. It’s like being back in film appreciation class in college.
He’s far from the only webcomic artist to do this, too. Look at El Goonish Shive, for example: Constant commentary on the choices involved in making the comic, and it’s much more fun for all that. If it detracts from your experience, then please ignore it, and let those of us who appreciate it enjoy it, because for me it doesn’t detract, it enhances the pleasure, and it’s one of the reasons that Selkie remains on my keep-up-with-daily short list, as few comics do (since I’m generally a binge reader).
Sorry if I sound weird I just think kids need to know its ok to feel angry, or sad or afraid just as its ok to feel happy. My parents never let me feel those things and I was on a lot of strong mood surpresnt meds as a kid so I would be easier for my teachers to handle. I relate a lot with Amanda maybe cause its the first time seening a character in a story with my name and its weird to see all the comments about her and not see myself too. I had a lot of explosive anger issues as a kid. I still do as an adult. She shouldn’t call selkie a that though I highly disagree with her doing that though.
I agree with you. Children *do* need to know it’s okay to be angry. That said, they also need to be taught that there are consequences depending on how they deal with their anger. So far I see nothing wrong with what Amanda is saying as terribly hurtful as it must be to Selkie and Todd. Most kids her age, I would not say that about, but when it comes to anger management she is underdeveloped as she has not been exposed to a healthy family environment for very long (even a “good” orphanage is no place for a child to develop such things). They are her *real feelings*. Hopefully this will be the start of her learning to forgive, love, and trust (and be kind to) people who are good to her.
This is something I’ve expressed to my nephew repeatedly, because he too has anger issues: Being angry is not a sin. You can be angry and still not sin. It’s what you do with it, and whether you choose to, well, wallow in it, I guess. Jesus was angry with the money-changers in the temple, enraged really, and he wasn’t sinning. Emotions aren’t sinful.
It bugs me when my mom occasionally tries to go over the Fruit of the Spirit, and contrasts it to sinful attitudes, and puts anger on that list. Because I feel like it’s undoing the progress I’m making with him, trying to help him see that he doesn’t need to suppress his anger, he just needs to redirect it so it doesn’t spill out at people or at objects around him, and so he can deal with it and defuse it instead of letting it control him.
This is a kid who’s 250 lbs. at age 11, and who we’ve almost called the cops on more than once on account of him going into a temper tantrum that threatened to hurt those around him. So finding ways to help him manage his anger is paramount. The good thing is that this year he seems to have come a long way in being able to work on his emotions without a tantrum, even when he’s clearly struggling with them — though it still feels like he’s using it sometimes to manipulate us (“placate me or I’ll go wild”). But definitely he’s come a long way.
Anger is a funny emotion. People are scared of it even more than seething hatred because it’s there, showy, and explosive. Just like a car crash. It’s that fear that makes people rank it as a “bad” emotion.
I’ve always laughed at that since if properly regulated it lets us stand up for ourselves. It gives us courage. It grants drive to do what’s right in the face of terror. We need anger, we need rage. But we must regulate it.
I would teach Amanda and in fact teach my niece that proper anger managed well is good but not to live off the rage alone. Amanda must have her self esteem brought up the correct way. Not by preying on others but by boosting herself through accomplishment and her positive traits. Then her anger would change into something wonderful.
Our angers give us passions.
I get the feeling you’d like the “Balance of Wisdom” card deck I’m designing. Its purpose is to contrast different principles and have you think whether to focus on one or the other or whether to find some middle ground or third option. Like, Love vs. Duty, or Material vs. Spiritual, or Fight vs. Compromise, there’s a place for each one and the other one is not superior, just different and needed for different things.
“A time for peace, a time for war” and all that (I know it’s a song, but the original comes from the writings of King Solomon, during some of his downer times). Sometimes it’s right to lay down your arms; sometimes it’s wrong and will let evil harm those you could protect. I don’t happen to think that MORALS are situational, but certainly how you apply those morals is going to change based on the situation. It takes wisdom to know what to do when.
One of the reasons I’m really enjoying Theo, by the by. He seems to have a great deal of wisdom in his choices, even the odd ones, and he’s not quick to jump to conclusions.
That’s your cue, Andi. Step up. Fix this.
The one who needs to step in here is Andi…
…and “That” continues to be why I have trouble finding sympathy for Amanda. Not “her”. I could get behind “her”. But still “that” and “fishface” and the other crappy things that she has said and done to Selkie even before this was in the realm of possibility that they share a dad.
I’d feel sad for her if she didn’t attack Selkie too. I can excuse the rationalization (he didn’t know) as well as the tantrum (she’s an unbalanced kid), but calling Selkie an “it” is bad and I hope she gets called out for that once they calm her down.
That can wait though. The entire root of all of this is what Andi did and didn’t do, and until that gets taken care of Amanda will always refer to Selkie as an “it”.
Amanda’s issues with Selkie (got attention of adults when Amanda needed it) and Todd (picked the child she hated over her) have NOTHING to do with what Andi did at this point. I mean, yes, if she hadn’t given her up way back when all of this would have never happened, but that ship has sailed. These are SEPARATE problems, and turning Amanda against her mom (which thankfully seems to be not so easy) won’t accomplish ANYTHING.
Kinda hard to recognize someone if you don’t know they even exist.
Not entirely true. My uncle was fighting in Vietnam when his girlfriend left him not telling him she had his baby. The girlfriend died and my cousin went to an orphanage and had a lot of abandonment issues like Amanda when her maternal grandmother attempted to adopt her then didn’t because she was too ‘wild’ like her father. My cousin searched for years for any info on her dad. My uncle never knew he even had a daughter but when a war Buddy showed him a picture of her, she looked just like him he knew it had to be his daughter. He found out who her mom was and DNA proved it was his daughter. She really does look just like him even share same name. But I don’t get along with her. Its much like Selkie and Amanda. She accused me when I was have seizures of taking attention from her along with other hateful names..
Yeah but here’s the thing. He thought she was dead. There’s the difference. He wouldn’t be looking for his own face if he didn’t know she was alive. If he had any idea,I think he would arrange to adopt both of them.
I think this is far from the worse thing that could happen. There have been too many secrets and festering hurt feelings surrounding this entire situation. Now that things are out there everyone can start trying to openly deal with them.
That being said, it’s about time to call a stop to this dialogue. The discussion is on the verge of tipping over into real nastiness (in the “saying things that can never be unsaid” sense); I’m hoping Todd’s grandparents intervene because everyone else is too emotional. I also hope Todd learns from this – his daughter is doing to him exactly what he just did to Amanda. Amanda is *absolutely* justified in being angry and hurt, but that doesn’t mean she is justified in cursing at Todd; Todd is completely justified in being furious at Andi, but that also doesn’t mean that he should be frightening and borderline threatening her.
While I’m not happy about the way Amanda refers to Selike in this strip, I also think it’s kind of understandable (although not excusable). Amanda has been jealous of Selkie for a long time and now she has another, HUGE, reason to be jealous. She’s furious right now and she’s also a child (who has a lot of emotional issues to work through). Amanda is not very sensitive to the feelings of others on her best day and this is far from her best day.
With kids, it’s often two steps forwards and one step back. I do think Amanda and Selkie’s relationship is progressing. They are probably never going to be best friends, but in the more recent strips there has been a different quality to their fighting. As the oldest of three sisters, I can say with assurance that there is a particular way that sisters fight; it’s almost like friendly anger, if that makes any sense. IMHO, Amanda and Selkie’s interaction is getting much closer to that quality of hostility, even in this strip with Selkie’s “I’ll gores you for that laters!” Selkie knows what is going on isn’t really about her, but no way can she let Amanda get away with that. 😉
Those are his parents. Not Grandparents. He’s justified to be pissed at someone who deeply betrayed and hurt him. She doesn’t know the entire story at all.
Oops on the grandparents typo – I’m at my mom’s house right now with my sister and my niece (her daughter) so I was a little distracted while replying. (I just noticed another typo in my original post as well). In any case, I think they’re the “cooler and wiser” heads right now and I hope they are able to step in an diffuse all these explosive emotions.
But Todd didn’t even borderline threaten Andi. The closest he got was to walk closer and say try HARDER which isn’t a threat, even leaning forward.
I read people getting after him for barely restrained rage. His crime was place and time, not yelling at Andi. She has done the unthinkable, she deserves to be yelled at, screamed at. It doesn’t matter she’s trying to make things better. It doesn’t matter her mom pressed her. She must learn the full damage she caused. That means she might hear it often and sometimes it will be loud. Very loud.
Todd must express this pain. He cannot hold it in or hold back any of it aside from making sure Amanda doesn’t deal with the blowback. An error on his part, but if Amanda can release rage then it can be of use.
I have seen people suggest he might be abusive and I shake my head. He’s not some vile person. He’s a man that needs to heal, and sometimes healing hurts. In this case, healing is thunderous.
I was going off the illustration where he’s advancing on her, gritting his teeth, and bending and flexing his arm in what I read as preparation to take a swing at her. If you go back to that particular post, you’ll see other readers interpreted it that way. In any case, if someone addressed me with those words and body language, I’d feel threatened. I said “borderline” because I’m not sure he meant to come off that way but his anger was obviously getting the better of him. I don’t think he’s abusive; I think he’s very angry and hurt.
Whether or not Andi “deserves” this kind of reaction from Todd (that’s a whole other topic thread, I think) it was NOT okay for Todd to do that with Amanda and Selkie in the house. Now the children are drawn into this and Amanda feels she needs to take sides with Andi against Todd. Not helpful and not a good introduction to her biological father. Todd needs to take it up with Andi in private at a different time. Even if he thought the kids were elsewhere and not listening, anyone with any experience of children knows they are masters at hearing things not meant for their ears. These children have both had MAJOR life changes just dumped on their heads. The adults need to be a united support system, not a source of more upsettedness.
Could you not act like he’s the abuser when she’s been emotionally abusive.
He would NEVER hurt her and I’m disgusted with people equating expressing his anger to fucking abuse. It’s hideous and unnecessary.
“I don’t think he’s abusive; I think he’s very angry and hurt.”
That is the last sentence from my first paragraph of the post to which you responded. I DON’T see him as an abuser at all and I do not think I was stating or even suggesting that.
I’ve had anger problems in my time as well and I know how anger can take you over, especially when you are justifiably angry at someone else’s bad behaviour. I think Todd could have behaved better but his response is understandable.
I think different people may read the graphic component of graphic novels differently, which is one of the nuances of the medium. However, while I personally read Todd’s attitude and words in that one instance as threatening, I don’t think that equals abusive.
Sorry. Didn’t notice it right away. DX
Where has Andi been abusive??? I think you are way far into imaginationland here. Take three steps back, take a deep breath and repeat: “Andi is not Satan. Hurting her is not making things better. Andi is not Satan Hurting her is not making things better. Andi is not”
She’s treated Todd horribly and done a whole ton of nasty things. Like seriously. He isn’t the only one she hurt and betrayed.
It’s not really that far fetched, actually. At the very least she’s been a total selfish jerk. To give some examples.
Page 161:
The first time they met up after the breakup. they start discussing the breakup, and she outright accuses him of throwing her out like trash. He objects, and points out she’s not thinking about how he feels. She ignores that and turns it back to about how she feels. Also, in this particular comic she says she doesn’t throw away people she loves…she’s saying this while knowing she gave up a baby for adoption without ever looking back.
Page 162, the very next comic:
Todd reminds her of the state of the relationship before the adoption comment. Andi backtracks, admitting she didn’t want to talk about kids at the time for reasons she states. Here she points out she wants a chance to fix what went wrong the first time…without explaining what she meant.
If she might finding Amanda, she obviously didn’t realize she’s always had chances to do that, and here was a great chance to tell Todd about it. If she might having another biological kid and keeping it…then she would be ignoring the fact she gave a child up for adoption without telling Todd. I really don’t know if she wanted to avoid adoption becuase she wanted to avoid the chance of them finding Amanda. That the very least this comic shows Andi refusing to accept the real reasons they broke up.
Page 163:
Andi is again stating what she wants, without considering what Todd wants now. He points out they can’t agree how to progress, and Andi begs for more time to figure it out. Which…if you’re in a relationship for eight years and you don’t know how to progress, it’s pretty clear sign that you haven’t even considered it. I think Todd realizes that if she hasn’t decided by now, she isn’t going to decide in another few months. She’s still trying to get him to bend to her will, without considering what he wants. Oh, and she also refuses to consider Selkie, Todd’s new daughter which she was made aware of before she came over.
Abuse is a much broader category than I ever expected it to be, back when I started researching it.
I would say, unequivocably, if you maintain a relationship on the basis of a lie that you know very well would likely end the relationship right then and there — especially the type of lie that the person you’re with fully deserves to know the truth of — then you are ABUSING that person.
You are treating them as something you deserve to have, even while you deserve to lose them. You are treating them like an object that exists for your pleasure. You are denying their free will, their right to choose, their right to informed consent in what they are choosing. You are failing to acknowledge that their rights matter more than your feelings do.
These are the types of actions and attitudes that underscore abusive behavior in general. “I deserve to have this person’s love, service, and sex even if they don’t want to give them to me.” “Anything that interferes with my pleasure is an enemy to be defeated; I’ll never just accept that I’ve lost someone or that the right thing to do is back off.” “I don’t need to tell them about the other women (or my STI) because then they’d get angry at me or dump me.” “My wife’s right to be safe and happy is less important than my right to have her do whatever the hell I say.”
These attitudes are pervasive and it’s astounding that large parts of our society seem to think they’re no big deal.
Andi has these attitudes. She was willing to lie to Todd for years rather than risk his anger and the breaking up of their relationship. She terminated his parental rights while thinking primarily about her own desires (continuing to be in a relationship with Todd) and ignoring his desires (to have a kid, to be in a relationship with someone who also wanted children, to do good by the children he did have). On multiple occasions she talked around issues manipulatively rather than come clean and deal with the consequences, and that’s a deeper character flaw than just being scared.
How would your analysis change if Andi were Andy and Todd were Tina? Tina gives birth, Andy whisks the child away, Tina comes out of the drugs and goes “Where’s my baby?” and Andy goes “Aww, honey, they did all they could but she’s gone.” And Tina — and her entire family — deals with eight years of that sorrow. (Okay, this is reminding me of the story of Joseph: sold into slavery by his brothers, who brought their dad a bloody coat and claimed Joseph had been eaten by wolves.)
If Andy then sought out the kid, got her back, and tried to make nice over the incident — especially if it seemed, even slightly, to be some ploy to get back into Tina’s good graces (or at least her pants) — would you be granting him the benefit of the doubt, that he’s not really abusive, you don’t understand how scared he was at the thought of a new kid in the house, it’s understandable that he’d do something like this, it’s just a lie and not really indicative of a greater character flaw, don’t you realize how horrible he’s felt ever since that day?
I grant Andi a lot, and I’m not as hard on her as many others here in the comments section. I don’t think she’s irredeemable and I do find her interesting and likable in certain circumstances. But she is a flat-out ABUSER. And failing to acknowledge that… well, it’s par for the course in a society where some actual police officers think that over 50% of rape reports are fraudulent, especially if there’s a marriage involved.
She very much does deserve the treatment she’s getting from everyone both good and bad. Her lies in my eyes (rhyme) are in my opinion psychotic. She watched him for so long suffering off her lie. She could have ended that pain. But she didn’t for her own comforts. (You can say whatever justification or defense she had but it was still out of selfishness.) Someone that would psychologically torture a man for 8 years deserves shouting at. It brought me down after 6 months. And I still think about the child I could have had but didn’t. I wanted to squeeze her neck until her eyes popped out!
But I think she also deserves Amanda’s treatment of her. It keeps her reminded that she has a girl to care for. Keep her eyes on the prize.
I read his posture as just walking. People swing their arms when they walk. I have no doubt she’s been abused. She is cowering and her behavior screams of a shattered woman. But I think the blame should be on mommy dearest who has a history of domineering behavior towards Andi.
I guess some people have to be in Todd’s place to understand. I pray none of you have to understand on that level. It, it eats you up and does damage. Hard damage.
Yeah. That part about her watching Todd be in pain for years? That’s what really prevents me from empathizing with or feeling sorry for Andi. A funeral, an urn, eight years keeping her mouth shut. Decent people don’t do that.
1) Wow, nice ableism there with ‘psychotic’. Mental illness just makes for such great insults, wow!
2) Andi was freaking terrified out of her mind. She wasn’t ‘psychologically torturing’ him anymore than she was torturing herself. LAY OFF.
It’s not ableism. Haven’t you ever looked at someone whose behavior you didn’t like and called it psychotic or psycho?
Besides, she wasn’t always scarred. She wasn’t always pressed by her mom. At some point it became less fear about the situation and more she just didn’t want to lose what she wanted. She let him beat himself up because doing the right thing would take away something she liked.
I get she’s passive and is barely now stopping being a coward. But there is just being scared and being pure WRONG. She was the second when she gave them a fake body and looked Todd in the eyes every day knowing she was the cause of his pain. That takes a complete lack of empathy.
Yep. Maybe it could be understandable if she keep the secret for just a few months. But it was a few years. YEARS. Years in which she moved into her own place, keep seeing Todd and his parents. Which they were discussing MARRIAGE and HAVING MORE CHILDREN. Even then she didn’t tell him. I think people get so wrapped in Andi’s fears when she was a teenager that they don’t see anything else. There’s a comment above stating Andi’s actions as abuse. And that actually makes sense to me.
>It’s not ableism. Haven’t you ever looked at someone whose behavior you didn’t like and called it psychotic or psycho?
It’s on the list of “things that everyone used to do that are no longer okay”.
Psycho is an ableist slur that’s used to demean mentally ill people. So yeah you were being a bit ableist.
Well I am the old fogey. :p
That said, I do think Andi may have some mental trauma. Hear me out because I am not attacking her.
She was able to keep up that lie for that long. Anyone else would spill the beans out of empathy or guilt. This, while I still see as selfishness might speak of survival behavior because of her mom. It isn’t a stretch to say her mom tried muzzling strong emotional outbursts because she just didn’t want to hear it. That would stunt emotional growth.
So perhaps I spoke out of turn when I said psychotic, however, I will not apologize for suggesting she might “have a few wires crossed” as the saying goes because under the ministrations of the, sarcasm intended, oh so wonderful example of humanity she calls a mother.
So I see her behavior as selfish, I can see where she might not see it as something people should not do.
I acknowledge the ableism inherent in the term (and, having only recently learned this concept myself, have been more careful about not using terms like that).
But I would like to know, what terms should be used, if your main point is “This isn’t just a critical lack of empathy, I actually think she is written in a way that indicates a very real mental imbalance or psychotic disorder” without being as wordy as I just was. Or is wordiness called for?
Still, I don’t think Andi had a lack of empathy. I think she got paralyzed by empathy. She could see what would happen if she spoke up, and it made her unwilling to take that step, even if it was the right thing to do.
There’s a House episode where Cameron is supposed to tell a young woman that she’s got inoperable lung cancer and just a few months to live, but she gets so concerned for the patient having no friends and family that she instead forms a friendship and has a few laughs and such. Dr. Wilson calls her on it: If that patient’s not crying by the end of the meeting, Cameron has failed to convey the seriousness of what’s going on, and it is not doing the patient any favors if she’s happy right now but completely unprepared for how short her life has become.
That’s when a certain type of empathy gets in the way of doing what’s right. And it’s not that Andi isn’t weak or isn’t self-centered or isn’t abusive — she was all of these things — but I don’t think she had a LACK of empathy.
Whoops – typo! I meant “his daughter is doing to him exactly what he just did to *Andi.*” Hopefully the meaning was clear from the context!
Shit + Fan
Well, at least all the brewing feelings are being talked (or yelled) about. Perhaps it will give them a start on picking up the pieces and building some kind of strong family in the future.
I didn’t bring a sword or chain mail to the store where I work, but yesterday, some idiot brought a gun and a machete. The police “persuaded” him to “be elsewhere.”
If Todd thinks an angry daughter is frightening, he should meet some of the customers I meet in the average week. And “Black Friday” week is even worse.
Oh dear, poor Amanda. The problem here is that both sides have valid points, ones which the other side finds offensive/hurtful/mean. This…probably isn’t going to end to well.
Amanda is deeply hurt here. Calling Selkie a ‘that’ isn’t right, but she’s saying it in anger and in an attempt to hurt Todd more than to hurt Selkie. She’s trying to say, “You’d over look your own daughter who looks just like you for a FISH? REALLY?” I don’t think she truly thinks Selkie isn’t a person with feelings and substance. While she’s definitely wrong for saying it and using it as a means to hurt somone, I think we need to consider she’s very angry and VERY hurt. Andi needs to talk to her about Selkie, that’s for sure, but I think jumping on her right this second would do more harm than good. The present issues at hand are, Amanda was abused, she has abondonment issues, she has control issues because she felt like she wasn’t in control if her own life before, she has neglect issues, she has anger issues and she has self-loathing issues that manifest as her pretending she’s better than others. Her personal issues with Selkie and the name calling are DEFINITELY an issue, but I kinda think presently they need to get to the root of HER problems before they address her problems with Selkie. Because until those problems are address she will NEVER be able to properly address the problems she has with Selkie. Fix Amanda first, then fix her relationship with Selkie.
Yeah, Amanda’s issues with Selkie are deep-seated and myriad. She still blames Selkie for not getting the attention she needed when she was abandoned, after all, and now Selkie’s stolen her FATHER’S attention too and it’s just a big mess of this girl needs so much help.
Indeed! As I was pointing out to my mom the other day, you don’t just handle the surface-level behavior, you work on the underlying attitudes that create it.
My mom has a strong dislike for swearing of any kind, but most notably “god” or “oh my god.” I was pointing out that we want the kids (her grandkids, my nephews and nieces) to come to appreciate who and what God is, not police their language for words whose meaning they don’t really care about. If they learn to have reverence for God, they’ll correct their speech on their own.
Similarly, if Amanda learns to respect Selkie as a sister and as a person with hopes and dreams very much like her own (a secure relationship with a loving family, reconnecting with her parents, finding out who she is in this world and what she’s meant to do with her life, having fun times, proving she’s worth the applause of others, etc. etc.), then the language issues will clear up on their own — or become terms of endearment rather than ridicule.
Correcting the language now (in the general sense of “around this point in the relationship”) will have minor effects at best, and act as sort of a shield for Selkie. Correcting it now (in the sense of “the thing they point out at this point in the conversation”) may have detrimental effects, because it doesn’t seem to me like the sort of detail they ought to be focusing on.
There are things that you let go so you can work with more important issues. I’m not sure if this is one of those things or not, but then, I don’t have the background of being bullied for being who I was, so I’m not the one who gets to make that call.
Yes, Amanda, you should definitely gore Selkie for that later. 😉
Awww… It’s fixed now…
I honestly feel really bad for Selkie right now.
Then Todd, then Amanda, then Andi.
Selkie is doing her best when faced with her “mortal enemy” being made into her sister, and ignoring being refered to as a “that”, she’s now also dealing with someone outright saying, that same enemy turned sister no less, that Todd shouldn’t have adopted her.
And I still say that panel of Todd in the last comic wasn’t a portrait of someone yelling at another person, but at some valiantly attempting to keep a lid on a boiling cauldron of rightous anger.
Worse. She’s dealing with someone who has bullied her for years for basically no reason, and not only is being forced into proximity with that bully in what was formerly a place of refuge for her, she’s having to deal with her father, the adults she’s barely grown to trust, AND THE AUTHOR pretending that the bullying of her is some kind of mutual thing that’s as much her fault as Amanda’s.
Huh?
Yeah, I’m confused here too. Doesn’t seem like the comic implied that at all.
The most I see in the pages just before the board game are that Selkie — who is a predator with harmful teeth, claws, and saliva — needs to keep more of a lid on physical acts of aggression than Amanda does. And I find that principle reasonable. I’d even say it’s downplayed.
Also, Makokam: I’m with you on the interpretation of Todd’s face. I was confused when everyone said he was yelling. He seems very much to be trying to hold back what he could be saying, and I’d imagine his speech would be far more colorful were he to give up control the way people seem to think he has.
The physically getting in her personal space, though, I find a bit worrisome. Though I really don’t know what sort of anger issues he has, now, as an adult; I so far haven’t seen much from him before this point (or at least, I don’t recall much).
Speech bubble in frame 3 has Selkie’s speech pattern, but is pointing at Amanda.
Yes — imagine it in quotation marks, being said in a furious, dismissive, sarcastic voice. (To Dave: A lot of people are misunderstanding this and thinking it’s a mistake. Quote-marks would definitely help.)
It actually is a mistake, Selkie’s supposed to be saying it. Just been running around all day so didn’t get to change it or confirm it yet.
Ah. That changes things, it does. It means Amanda isn’t being particularly nasty about Selkie, except with one dismissive word in passing while she’s getting her point across to Todd — and Selkie is not just standing there all hurt, she’s giving as good as she gets.
I like this better.
(It must be a phrase from Selkie’s favourite TV show, because, as some commenters noticed, she has used that exact wording before.)
I think it just might be in line with her nature. She is a predator after all. I mean, she has fangs, claws and venom.
And Pohl’s wife taught her to subtly threaten at mauling someone to death in order to make people leave her alone. So goring somone seems in line with that.
And here I was just taking it as a play on words. You know: iGnORE = gore.
I know this is supposed to be a serious strip but here amanda just makes me giggle.. her reaction is so realistic. Shes both a product of her environment and well beyond her years. Amanda doesn’t get enough credit for intelligent she is, I feel.
+1 000 000 maturity points to Selkie for giving that remark but not making it all about her. She already knows why Amanda hates her, and can accept it – not accept and put up with that kind of behavior like it’s normal, but understand the reasons and step aside to let Amanda deal with the source. It’s not fair for Amanda to blame Selkie for just existing, but it’s not a thing that’s going to be resolved with Selkie yelling at her, and she realizes that.
Out of the younger generations – Todd, Andi and two girls – Selkie is currently acting the most mature…
Of course, too, putting Todd’s failure to adopt Amanda wholly on Todd’s shoulders also relieves Amanda of a burden—that she’s such a nasty piece of work that even her own father wouldn’t adopt her.
I don’t know if it’s been pointed out yet but there maybe another reason to dislike Andi: It’s one thing that she knew Todd was adopted and then dissed adoptees to his face but if she knew Todd was abused while in the system and STILL put her own daughter in it – that would be a big mark against her IMHO.
I’m quite sure Todd got abused by his birth parents and by getting into the system ended up with loving parents. Therefor knowing his Story would lead Andi to assume that Amanada would benefit from adoption.
I’m gonna take a wild flying guess that the next words out of Amanda’s mouth are something along the lines of not wanting Todd’s name on her birth certificate…
Maybe not, “I don’t want you on my birth certificate.” but rather, “I don’t need/want you as a dad, all I need is my mom!”
So what is Amanda saying in the last panel. Dumb F*CK? or Dumb PR*CK?
(Can’t resist) I’m guessing Dumb F*CK because Todd’s head isn’t big enough to hide a Dumb PR*CK.
I don’t know. An R* takes up more space than a *, but if we actually put the letters in it’s different. A capital RI takes up about the same or a little more space as a capital U (depending on the font you use). It can be all the more the case with handwritten wording. Dumb pr*ck actually makes more sense than dumb f*ck.
….
Wow
“I know, right?”